Great Scene: “There’s Something About Mary”
Ah, the infamous ‘hair gel scene.
Ah, the infamous ‘hair gel’ scene.
Back in 1998, I was at CAA when my agent pulled me into his office: “You have to see this!”
Grinning wildly, he informs us it’s a rough cut clip from the new movie the Farrelly brothers are working on. He turns on the VCR and we all watch the now famous “hair gel” scene from There’s Something About Mary.
After we all stop laughing, our agent says, “That one scene will make that movie a hit.”
Now that’s a great scene.
Here’s the scripted version:
INT. TED'S HOTEL BATHROOM - SAME
Ted has a newspaper splayed out on the counter (open to the bra
ads) as he furiously FLOGS THE DOLPHIN (chest-high side view.) We
see some balled-up tissue nearby. After several frantic strokes,
he takes a deep breath and slowly and loudly EXHALES, clearly
having COMPLETED HIS MISSION.
He draws a few more breaths, picks up a face cloth, and goes to
clean up.
But something's missing: The Load. Ted looks down, checks his
hands, pants, shoes, looks in the sink, finally glances at the
ceiling, with no luck.
The Load IS MISSING!!!!
That's when the doorbell RINGS. Ted couldn't look more HORRIFIED.
As he buckles his pants, he makes a last, panicky reconnaissance
of the area. The doorbell RINGS AGAIN and Ted reluctantly goes to
answer it.
INT. TED'S HOTEL ROOM - SAME
Ted opens the door and Mary is standing there looking as lovely as
ever.
TED
Hey.
MARY
Hi, Ted.
TED
You look great.
MARY
Thanks.
She notices something.
MARY (cont'd)
What's that?
TED
Hm?
MARY
On your ear, you've got something.
MARY'S POV - a HUGE LOAD is hanging off of Ted's earlobe like a
drop earring.
MARY (cont'd)
It looks like a gob of...
Mary leans forward for a closer look. Ted is terrified.
MARY (cont'd)
(making face)
Is that....hair gel?
BEAT.
TED
Sure.
MARY
Oh great, I ran out.
Before Ted can stop her, Mary grabs The Load off his ear and WIPES
IT IN HER BANGS.----INT. BAR - NIGHT
Ted's rolling a little wine around in a glass. He takes a sip,
nods his approval.
TED
Thanks, that's great.
The WAITER turns to Mary.
WAITER
Madame?
ANGLE ON MARY - The light, puffy bangs that Mary started the
night with are gone, replaced by a glazed, ACE VENTURA-STYLE WAVE
up front.
MARY
Thank you.
Here is the movie version of the scene:
What’s interesting is that in the script, there is this scene in between the bathroom and restaurant scenes:
EXT. UPSCALE NEIGHBORHOOD - NIGHT
Healy is still following Tucker in his car. Finally Tucker stops
in front of a lavish Victorian home and gets out carrying a pizza
and wearing a PIZZA DELIVERY HAT.
Healy SCREECHES to a sideways stop, jumps out and POUNCES ON HIM.
HEALY (cont'd)
You motherfucker, you're a dead man!
Tucker drops the pizza as Healy SLAMS HIM into a tree.
TUCKER
(cowering)
Okay, Pat, take it easy--don't do anything
stupid.
HEALY
Who the fuck do you think you are making up
that bullshit about me?!
Healy SLAMS HIM AGAINST THE TREE AGAIN.
TUCKER
Whoa, whoa--I don't know what you're talking
about.
HEALY
Maybe this'll jog your memory.
Healy SLAPS him across the face.
HEALY (cont'd)
I'll give you a hint--it's got something to
do with me being a murderer.
Healy raises his arm again and Tucker tries to shield himself.
TUCKER
Okay, okay, I might've gotten some bad
information.
Healy grabs him by the collar.
HEALY
That stalker Ted got to you, right? You're
working for him, aren't you, you little
shit?
TUCKER
Who?
Healy throws Tucker to the ground and takes off his sport coat.
HEALY
This is your last chance, you fuck. Now
either you come clean or I'm going to kick
your ass from here to Tallahassee.
Healy grabs Tucker by the hair and cocks his arm.
TUCKER
I LOVE HER, OKAY?!
Tucker suddenly gets emotional. Healy stops and looks at him.
HEALY
You what?
TUCKER
You heard me, goddamnit. I...I love her.
Healy slowly lets go.
TUCKER (cont'd)
I'm a phony--just like you, man.
HEALY
What do you mean?
TUCKER
I mean I'm a fucking fraud. I'm no
architect. Don't be a putz--who's been to
Santiago twice in a year?
(scoffing)
Estadio Olimpico--please!
HEALY
But...but you knew people at Harvard.
TUCKER
I knew shit. The only thing I knew was that
you were a fake and I made up everything
else.
(sighs)
My real name's Norm. I deliver pizzas.
HEALY
Bullshit!
Tucker rolls his eyes and pulls out his PIZZA DELIVERY BADGE, with
him pictured beside the name Norman Plante. As Healy let's this
sink in, we
CUT TO:
Easy to see why the movie cut directly from “Is that hair gel” to the restaurant revelation of Mary’s “ACE VENTURA-STYLE WAVE up front.”
There are these comments by Cameron Diaz:
American actress Cameron Diaz has revealed that she was not in favor of doing the infamous hair gel scene in There’’s Something About Mary: “I didn’t want to do it because I was so worried it would discredit Mary,” Fox News quoted her as saying. “My agent and manager thought that doing this film was an insane move I was told it would be the end of my career,” Diaz said before the screening.
From a script written by Ed Decter and John J. Strauss, and Peter Farrelly & Bobby Farrelly, There’s Something About Mary was a rarity for two reasons: (1) It was an R-rated comedy that grossed a ton of money ($369M worldwide) and (2) it made more money internationally than domestically. I think the explanation for both is the fact that the humor is largely visual, this scene a case in point.
For more articles in the Great Scene series, go here.