Daily Dialogue — March 24, 2020

Jerry: Oh no you don’t! Osgood, I’m gonna level with you. We can’t get married at all.
Osgood: Why not?
Jerry: Well, in the first place, I’m not a natural blonde.
Osgood: Doesn’t matter.
Jerry: I smoke! I smoke all the time!
Osgood: I don’t care.
Jerry: Well, I have a terrible past. For three years now, I’ve been living with a saxophone player.
Osgood: I forgive you.
Jerry: [tragically] I can never have children!
Osgood: We can adopt some.
Jerry: But you don’t understand, Osgood! Ohh…

Jerry finally gives up and pulls off his wig.

Jerry: [normal voice] I’m a man!
Osgood: [shrugs] Well, nobody’s perfect!

Jerry looks on with disbelief as Osgood continues smiling with indifference. Fade out.

— Some Like It Hot (1959), screenplay by Billy Wilder and I.A.L. Diamond, suggested by a story by Robert Thoeren and Michael Logan

The Daily Dialogue theme for the week: Final Words. Today’s suggestion by Amanda Graham.

Trivia: The now-famous closing line, “Nobody’s perfect,” was actually never intended to make the final film — it was apparently to be replaced by the writers once they thought of something they liked better. I.A.L. Diamond and Billy Wilder each credit the other for the genesis of the line. Wilder later fashioned his own epitaph with the similar line: “I’m a writer, but then nobody’s perfect.”

Dialogue On Dialogue: The actual scene description following the last exchange is this:

Jerry looks at Osgood, who is grinning from ear to ear, claps his hand to his forehead. How is he going to get himself out of this?

But that’s another story — and we’re not quite sure the public is ready for it.